The Power of Forgiveness

One of my favourite couple-friendships from East Belfast are the Quigley's. Peter and Beryl are so easy to be around and have one of the most wonderful gifts of hospitality. My wife and I just love a nights craic with these guys.

As they say here in Northern Ireland "they've been around a few corners", - meaning that they bring a wealth of wisdom to the conversation, from a rich seam of life experiences.

Listen out for Peter's thought for the day talks on Radio Ulster. They are always a great way to start your day.

Beryl's story is rather amazing. She is a woman whose husband was murdered by the IRA. She tells how she felt a spiritual compulsion to forgive his killers as he lay dying on the front doorstep of the family home.

Beryl was saying goodbye to her 35-year-old husband, William McConnell, the deputy governor of the Maze prison, when two gunmen appeared and opened fire at close range on 6th March 1984.

Mr McConnell, had been in charge of security at the jail. He was checking underneath his car for booby traps when he was shot dead in front of his wife and three-year-old daughter, Gail.

One man was later convicted of the Belfast man's murder and sentenced to life imprisonment.

Casting her mind back to the dreadful day she lost the father of their only child, Beryl revealed how "a conversation that I felt God was having with me" gave her comfort and told her what to do as William's life ebbed away.

"The conversation was, 'Beryl what are you going to do about this'?," she recalled as she shared her experience on the BBC's Talkback in December 2018.

"And I was saying to God, 'Well, I actually don't know who these guys were - there were two gunmen - I didn't know which side they were from or where they were from, so I couldn't give them a name, I couldn't give them a title, I just had to deal with terrorists..."

She explained that this was when she asked God for guidance.

"He reminded me of the Lord's Prayer and that part that talks about forgiving others," she said.

"And I said, 'Well Lord, I'm going to choose to forgive because that's what you're asking me to do, but you're going to have to help me every single day."

"And I can say that the Lord has helped me from March 6, 1984 until today, when I still keep walking in that place of forgiveness."

Beryl's powerful story of forgiveness is one of three being aired in a new film entitled Guardians of The Flame that explores the religious roots of the Northern Ireland conflict.

The compelling documentary also features Alan McBride, whose wife, Sharon (29), from Belfast, was killed in the 1993 Shankill bomb, and Eugene Reavey, whose three brothers were killed in the Whitecross shooting in 1976.

Beryl told Talkback (at the end of 2018) that forgiveness "brings about a sense of peace within your being and allows you to live life to the full".

"I'm aware that there's a lot of people in Northern Ireland who are broken, broken-hearted, lost loved ones," she said.

"They haven't been able somehow to get over it and live life and enjoy some of the good things that there are in families and in life in general.

"And so I would keep on saying, try to find a place to forgive and if you are on the faith journey at all, God will help you."

The commission Jesus gave his disciples, echos Beryls story when he said, 

“Peace be with you! As the Father has sent me, I am sending you.”22 And with that he breathed on them and said, “Receive the Holy Spirit. 23 If you forgive anyone’s sins, their sins are forgiven; if you do not forgive them, they are not forgiven."

Wouldn't it be great if the world had more Beryl stories? 

Maybe it's my turn to forgive someone and help heal a broken relationship?

I've seen the premier of 'The Guardians of the Flame'. This documentary is one of the best I have seen coming out of Northern Ireland. Worth a viewing.

https://www.guardiansoftheflame.org/